When I started out with this blog I didn't quite know where I would be heading. Today a little over a month later I still don't. Would it be cakes, cake art, everyday food, or what. So far I've had a couple of cakes, some everyday food, two cake arts, and a couple of or whats.
I have decided that this would definitely not be, by any means, a personal blog as in embarrassingly personal. I have secret stories not meant for human consumption :). So apart from being a so-so cook and an okay-I'm-a-pretty-good-baker and a self taught cake-arter, after ...(excuse me...let me check for a minute...ok I'm back)...twenty one posts, I've run out of steam. I'm in the typical ' I don't know what to cook!' state. I'm having cooker's block (silliness intended) like writers have writers block.
Normally when I'm not cooking for a blog I would just cook what I had cooked yesterday. Easy. Problem solved. And tomorrow I would probably cook what I had cooked the day before yesterday. But I'm cooking for a blog. I can't do that. What would people think?
I knew that having a food blog would be quite a challenge for me because each member in our family has different likes and dislikes. They each have their own brand of allergies, their own brand of food tolerance or intolerance, their own spice heat metering and so on and so forth. And in all those years that we have survived each other we have never come close to a truce.
So the repertoire of dishes that I churn out everyday where everybody can eat the same thing is very limited indeed. Sometimes I would end up cooking this for the children and that for my husband and when nobody is around I would cook something really, really hot and spicy and revel in the silence of my deserted home. But when the resident invaders strike I am conquered yet again. So most of the time I curtail myself to cooking the limited number of dishes that everyone can eat in peace and without fear of impending threats.
Problem : If I were to cook all kinds of different foods, for a lark, who would eat them? And would I have to cook, in addition to cooking for my blog, the 'usual' as opposed to the unusual? Wouldn't that mean that I am doing exactly what I had planned not to do ten years ago? Wouldn't that mean that I am inflicting upon myself the pain that I had planned to rid myself of some years ago when or if the children stopped being children? Wouldn't that mean that I would be digging a hole for myself that gets deeper and deeper as I blogger on?
So all that talk about cook bake and be merry cook bake and be merry cook bake and be merry (up there on the title header) was just, in truth, a phony line, invented by me to fill up that space by meaningless repetition. Not in the least related to my true calling. For I am, to all intents and purposes, a reluctant cook.
The way I see it cooking in the true sense of the word cannot possibly be merry unless one considers washing up as an immensely desirable past time like the total satisfaction of the subconscious one gets from ticking off one's to-do lists or finding immeasurable pleasure in finding the just-right sized tupperware for all those left overs. Some people do. Check this post out, A Dip, Blended and Bright Green on Carolyn's blog of Field to Feast. Unbelievable. Totally. And I don't get it.
I envy her I do.
So, you are asking me now, why on earth am I blogging? Food blogging you mean.
Answer : I have absolutely no idea. Perhaps it is just something that I have to do. Like finding the just-right sized tupperware for all those leftovers or ticking off my to-do list. Or having to do all that washing up. Perhaps I'm finding and have found a way out of reality and have lost myself in blogger land. I have fallen in and gotten quite lost. Just like Alice. Perhaps too, like Alice, I'm in on a journey of self discovery, seeking order in the my own confusion. Or I think perhaps, like housework, it's just a matter of cook bake and blogger on cook bake and blogger on.......
But what ever it is, with or without blogging, it still is......What shall I cook tomorrow????????
The answer I suppose is in here somewhere..
Some horrible looking limes that have seen better days.
Three lemons meant for some lemonade that never got made.
Five potatoes that I boiled this morning and abandoned.
And half a block of butter left over from the banana chocolate chip cake from my previous post.